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6 Love Language Questions Every Couple Should Ask

From Wake the Silence #5 — Our Relations


A couple sitting at a light wooden table, one writing in a notebook and the other holding a coffee mug, symbolizing a relationship exercise about love languages and gifts.
Simple questions can open the door to deeper understanding and connection.

Most couples have unspoken rules about how they give and receive love — and those quiet rules can cause misunderstandings.


These six questions will help you uncover what matters most to you and your partner when it comes to love languages and gifts.Use them over coffee, during a quiet evening, or on a walk together.

The 6 Questions

  1. What are my top love languages (words, quality time, gifts, service, touch)?

  2. What love language do I want most in this relationship?

  3. What love language do I think my partner needs most?

  4. Do I want presents in our relationship? What kind?

  5. Should we give each other gifts regularly — or only on special occasions?

  6. Do I like surprises, or should we talk about what we’d enjoy receiving?

How to Use Them

  • Answer separately and honestly.

  • Share without judgment or defensiveness.

  • Look for surprises and overlaps — they can be more telling than differences.

Why These Questions Matter

When couples talk openly about how they want to give and receive love, they remove the guesswork — and reduce the risk of hurt feelings.

These conversations turn “silent rules” into shared understanding, which makes love less fragile and more free.

💌 These 6 questions are just one part of the Our Relations conversation in Wake the Silence #5.

The full set includes 17 thoughtful prompts covering love languages, moods, honesty, and conflict.


👉 Get the full set free in my weekly Wake the Silence letter about intimacy, loyalty, and healing.

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